Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
