wrigley field is MILF paradise
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
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