I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
