Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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