I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
