I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
