His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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