what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Randomize
