i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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