How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
