I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Randomize
