dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize
