If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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