so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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