I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
