so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
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