All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
