Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
