idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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