I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
