Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
