allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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