Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize