He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
