Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
