haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize