hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize