So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
