butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
