I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
