i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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