i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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