How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
