The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize