For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
