I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
