You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
