Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
This is the high leading the old right now
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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