you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
