and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
