i barfeds in our rink
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize