I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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