I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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