i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
