that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
