so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
