ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
