Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
