Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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