the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
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The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
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stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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